[Below is an eval of the Red Sox players from <a href="mailto: craigjohnstone@mail.com">Craig J</a>, someone from Mass who is in a similar position as I (not originally from Mass, baseball fan, follows the Sox, roots for another team, doesn't particularly like the Sox). I added my own comments like this <u>David: </u> <i>text</i>. Read and enjoy, he's on target.]
Here's the Sports Guy on Fox?s apparent bias toward the Yankees: ?Well, here's your reward, guys: A Yankees-Marlins series that absolutely nobody will watch. Well done.? First of all ? on Fox hoping for the Yankees to win ? duh! The Yankees are only the most popular team in baseball, possibly in all of sports. Yes, millions of people hate them, but: 1) they are the most popular team in the number one market in the country; 2) there are millions of people in other markets who are transplanted New Yorkers or children of transplanted New Yorkers or whatever who are also fans. Plus, they are a team people like to hate. Many of those who hate them will still watch hoping they will lose. They?re not like the Giants who you might hate when you play against them but about whom you couldn?t care less when they?re playing someone else. Of course Fox wants the Yankees in the series. On the ratings issue, he?s only half right. Everyone, from Fox to baseball fans everywhere except Marlins fans (all 200 of them) and Cardinals fans, wanted to see the Cubs in the series. Cubs-Yankees would have been probably the highest rated series ever ? a true David vs. Goliath in action. Cubs-Red Sox would have drawn a fair amount of interest as well, because you knew one of the curses would have to come to an end (except in reality a Cubs-Red Sox series would probably signal Armageddon), but not as much as Cubs-Yankees. Nobody wants to see the Marlins. Nobody. Fox is counting its lucky stars that the Yanks are in it, because the only people who would have watched a Red Sox-Marlins series are the 200 aforementioned Marlins fans (and since most of them are over the age of 80, they might not all make it all the way through the series) and peoplein New England. This is what people from Massachusetts fail to understand ? that Boston stopped being ?the Hub? about when the War of 1812 ended. Nobody outside of New England gives a rat?s behind about the Sox. Ask someone in California or Texas about 1918 or the Curse of the Bambino or BillBuckner and you?ll get blank stares. It?s a regional team in a marginal region. Get over yourselves ? other than you and the Yankees fans that hate you, NO ONE CARES. The only thing worse for Fox than a Marlins-Red Sox series would be a Diamondbacks-Devil Rays series.
OK, now on them being a ?great bunch of guys? and a ?likable (sic) team?. Well, ahem, non-Red-Sox fans may beg to differ about how likeable all of them are.
Let?s go around the horn and check the old Like-O-Meter for the major players from the Sox. The Like-O-Meter represents the ultrascientific findings of my poll of everyone I could find who is 1) a baseball fan, but 2) neither a Red Sox nor Yankees fan.
Jason Varitek ? despite the fact that his last name sounds like a software company, and that he, like most people including everyone on the Sox, looks awful with a Van Dyke, seems like a decent enough guy. We would have some major criticisms of him as a defensive catcher if we were his manager, such as standing up for high fastballs and using his hands third-base-coach style instead of his fingers to call for pitches with runners on base, but we can?t see any reason not to like the guy and are sure he?s a decent enough fellow, even if he does need some help in the personal grooming department. Like-O-Meter rings him up at an A-.
<u>David:</u> <i>Overall I like this guy. Doesn't talk crap, plays hard, good team guy. But I still have problems with the fact that he had (and might still have) Scott Boras as an agent when he came out of Georgia Tech as the year's best catching prospect only to refuse to sign when Seattle didn't meet Boras' high demand, creating an ugly situation. But I guess you can't blame a player for wanting a ton of money to play a sport right out of college. </i>
Kevin Millar ? Oh my god, where to start on one of the biggest dirtbags to ever play the game??? If this guy gains a few more pounds, he could be Jon Kruk?s brother. Millar is the kind of guy you see at wet T-shirt contests in Daytona wearing a sleeveless T-shirt that says, ?Free Moustache rides? and a Harley bandana on his head trying to pick up college girls. And ?Cowboy Up?? Spare us. Stupid made-up catch phrases don?t win championships (and neither does hitting .240) Like-O-Meter can barely register, but gives him a D- only because we need to save room for Manny and Pedro.
<u>David:</u> <i>This guy should be shot simply for the Cowboy Up crap he started. And the Born in the USA thing or whatever he was doing with that Bruce S. song. Ugh. That Cowboy Up thing was annoying two seconds after he said it. And the yahoos around here loved it. Send him to Japaon.</i>
David Ortiz ? was probably a decent person until he got around Pedro and Manny. They seem to have corrupted him. Watching him huddle together with those two thugs on the end of the bench reminds us of those times in school when you would see the kid who used to be your friend and was once a normal kid but then something went wrong and he fell in with the juvenile delinquents and then you would see him with his new hoodlum buddies under the bleachers slouching together to smoke and plan how they?re going to rip off Metallica (or nowadays it would be Eminem) CDs at K-Mart after school and then egg the gym teacher?s house. Good hitter, though. Horrible defensive first baseman ? makes Giambi look like Mattingly. This guy should be a career DH. Like-O-Meter would give him a B+, but gets major points deducted for associating with Manny and Pedro so much, bringing him down to a C.
<u>David:</u> <i>I kid you not, I think I saw him and Manny tongue kissing. He took this team hug stuff way to far. I was starting to blush it got so bad. But I do like him because he seemed to come up big when needed most, except in the playoffs. </i>
Todd Walker. Again, we don?t know who?s giving these guys grooming tips, but he can?t pull off either the goatee or the blues patch that he?s had at various times throughout the year. Dude, you?re not hip - you look like a Mormon. Just show up dressed to play and play. Don?t try to get all Carson Daly on us. Other than that, we don?t have a problem with the guy. He?s a little annoying, but not a bad guy. Like-O-Meter gives him a B.
Nomar Garciaparra ? OK, he has OCD, but he can?t help that. Nomar is hands-down the classiest guy on the Sox. Great hitter (despite slumping a bit at the end of this year), good fielder, great guy. We don?t know anyone who wouldn?t want Nomar on their team. Look at the way he plays the game ? the way it was meant to be played. Look at the way he treats opponents ? with respect and class. He shows that you can play the game 100 percent to win and go all out without having to act like a complete ass in the process and/or belittle your opponents. Like-O-Meter clanging all the way up to an A+.
<u>David:</u> <i>I have to disagree with Craig here. This guy is probably the greatest shorstop in the game right now (behind Jeter and A Rod of course), but the media freakin hates him. He refused to talk to the media and instead of using them to help him, he turns other Sox players against them. Don't get me wrong, the media around here is brutal, but Nomar could try to use them in his favor for once. Plus he needed to shave his head during the playoffs, just for the jokes. </i>
Bill Mueller ? Well, he can?t pronounce his own name and, once again, we?ve got major problems with bad facial hair, but he seems like a decent person. The major complaint with him was the cheesiness he showed by sitting out the last day of the season to secure his batting title. Ted Williams played the last game when he was batting .400! His head must be spinning in its cryogenic chamber after watching what Mueller and Grady Little pulled. Sitting out the last day when you?re up by one point is the ultimate lame, cheesy, pathetic, unsportsmanlike cop-out. Like-O-Meter punishes him severely, dropping him down from a B to a C-.
Manny Ramirez ? There is nothing good that can be said about Manny with a straight face. Not about his horrible, selfish attitude; not about his copping out on his team in August when he had the ?flu? but could still party with Enrique Wilson in the hotel at night; not about his oversize uniform that makes a mockery of looking professional and makes him look like he?s trying out for the Backstreet Boys; not about the total lack of class he showed by trying to charge the mound WITH THE BAT IN HIS HAND!!! after a pitch that wasn?t even off the plate. Nothing. Zip. Nada. Manny Ramirez is probably the biggest scumbag in the game today. Worse than Bonds. The only possible exception is his teammate Pedro. Like-O-Meter doesn?t even move: F.
<u>David:</u> <i>Craig forgot that embarassing display right after he hit the homerun in Oakland. He was not even half way to first when the ball clear the wall and he pointed to his dugout. If I were the other team, I would have thrown baseballs at him from the dugout. WTF? He has to be JOKING with that display. Hey Manny, you do nothing all series, and celebrate like you just won prom king. Give it up you freakin jerk. </i>
Johnny Damon ? Like Nomar, another great guy who knows how to play the game with class. We love Johnny. What a good guy. Hustles all the way. Always has a great attitude. We would be proud to have him on our teams. We just pray Manny and the others don?t get to him. Like-O-Meter bounces back up to an A.
<u>David:</u> <i>Throws like a girl. Looks like a cave man. But nice enough guy and was part of one of the worst on-field collisions I've ever seen.</i>
Trot Nixon ? Well, if you heard his speech after hitting the home run in Game 3 against Oakland, you know the guy has the Power and the Glory on his side. So, we can?t be too hard on someone who probably has a glow-in-the-dark plastic Jesus on his dashboard. In the appearance department, Trot needs a visit from the Fab Five. What is it with this team and ugly facial hair? Other than the fact that he is physically a mess and really needs some tips on looking professional (Memo to Trot: It does not show class or respect for your organization to look like you came to work directly from a coal mine. There?s a reason your team put a logo on your batting helmet. If no one can see it, it?s time to clean off the pine tar!), he?s probably a decent guy. Like-O-Meter gives him a B.
<u>David:</u> <i>One of the original dirt dogs. Hate that phrase. But seems like nice enough guy. Could lose some weight though. </i>
Derek Lowe ? The Like-O-Meter was pretty neutral about him before this year. He used to get sympathy votes for being such an awful closer who would always give up the big home run at the worst possible time. He never seemed to do anything bad or anything particularly good. He was just there. That was until he came in for the save against Oakland and acted like a complete jackass. The Like-O-Meter doesn?t care what he said in the papers the next day: yes, he WAS obviously giving the big Fungoo to the Oakland dugout and it showed NO class at all. Manny and Pedro must have gotten to him. Without negative role models like those two around, he would probably be fine. Now, the Like-O-Meter fears he?s degenerating. He gets a C, but could be slipping fast.
Tim Wakefield ? after what happened to him last night, we?ll just leave the poor guy alone.
John Burkett ? Like-O-Meter can?t find a problem with him. Doesn?t seem to go out of his way to have a positive influence like Nomar, but I think he?s just riding out the days till his retirement and enjoying being able to still throw the ball once a week. Plus, how can you hate a guy who once bowled a 300? Like-O-Meter gives him an A-.
Jeff Suppan ? not even worth rating. He?s not a real Red Sock, he?s a rent-a-player for the stretch drive. He won?t even be in a Boston uniform come spring training.
<u>David:</u> <i>Hey Theo, keep this guy next year and make him a starter - from a Yankee fan. </i>
BK Kim ? cocky little punk who gave his own fans the finger. ?Nuff said. D.
<u>David:</u> <i> See my note for Suppan but change starter to closer.</i>
Alan Embree, Mike Timlin, Scott Williamson, Scott Sauerbeck ? Like-O-Meter can barely tell them apart. Here?s a hint: Embree?s the lefty with a dorky Van Dyke, Williamson?s the righty with the dorky Van Dyke, Timlin the clean-cut righty, and Sauerbeck?s the clean-cut lefty. See Jeff Suppan above.
Pedro Martinez ? trying to pick the least likeable player on the Sox reminds me of that Bill & Hillary joke. You remember, the one that goes something like, ?Bill and Hillary are both drowning, who gets saved? The country.? Substitute?Pedro and Manny? for ?Bill and Hillary? and ?the Red Sox? for ?the country? and you?ve pretty much nailed it. Don?t the Sox get it? Don?t they see what?s happened with people like Bonds and Albert Belle over the years? You just won?t win it all with total a*#holes in your clubhouse. The baseball gods won't allow it. At some point, you have to be held accountable for your character and behavior. I thought the Sox learned this lesson with Carl Everett. I don?t care how good a player is in terms of individual talent, guys like this are poison to a team. Pedro has always been a spoiled baby of a player. He showed it in LA when, as a snot-nosed, wet-behind the ears kid, he insisted he should be a star starter before he had proven anything and moped and sulked when he was sent to the bullpen. He proved it for four years in Montreal by acting like a spoiled brat prima donna. He proved it this past Spring Training when he bullied the Sox to pick up his option a year early or he would bolt. With his performance of throwing at Karim Garcia?s head and then miming that he would do the same to Jorge Posada, he showed the whole nation what those of us in New England have been seeing for years: he?s a total jerk. Plain and simple. The guy is just a downright complete and total jerk. Aside from his talent, he has no redeeming features. He let his team down that day in Boston, and he let his team down again last night by stubbornly refusing to come out of the game last night when he had nothing left. As long as his ego gets involved, he will always let his team down. The Sox should trade him now while he still has some trade value left. But, after his performance in the ALCS, he may be untradeable with the ridiculous salary he?s making combined with his antics. Like-O-Meter gives him a solid F.
<u>David:</u> <i>I couldn't agree more with Craig's assessment. The only thing more "Pedro" he could have done game three against the Yanks was to refuse to pitch the game unless the owners gave him a 3 year, 60 million contract extension. Let me get this straight - he tries to drill Garcia in the head because he was getting hit, he tells Posada that he is next, he pisses off Zim so much that the old fat man tries to hit him (I am laughing just typing that), and he loses game 7 for the pennant. Yep, there is a G*d. </i>
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